Monday, November 28, 2005

Random Stream of Consciousness BS

this Mac I'm usng has a very soft keyboard and I tend to type like I'm on one of those old portable manual typewriters. In other words, I do nott have a soft touch and this keyboard is not happy with me. So sorry for the many mistakes that will happen.

So, random dork moment of the day: Mom and I went into Springfield for our Mother And Daughter Shopping And Lunch Day today. We went to Tj Maxx (the one in Springfield is the best one ANYWHERE, it totally rocks) and leaving the store I ran smack into the door. In my defense it did say "Automatic Door" right there on the door..but it was one of those automatic doors where you have to push the buton to the side, you know? Anyhow, I saw the sign, kept walking and smacked right into it with a resounding, store silencing crash. Mom is STILL busting out into giggles, even three hours later. I'm so glad I can enterrtain her. I think I give her much pleasure, lately, with my totally nutburger activities.

While shopping I indulged and bought a full set of 380 thread count sheets. I sort of have a sheet and bed linens fetish, I LOVE buying sheets and things for the bed. It's been a long LONG time since I had indulged my fetish, since in Norway king sized beds don't exist. Oh but it's so nice to re-awaken my interior design side and buy some pretty thngs for the bed. As for how to get them home? Well, I've got over a montth to ffigure that out, so I'll worry about that LATER.

A bunch of big thunderstorms and wind rolled through here last night, it was COOL. I haven't had a good ol' head-knocking, house rattling t-storm in ages. There were alot of tornadoes around, too, though obviously not here. I will admit I had a small pile of things next to the basement stairs, JUST IN CASE. Passport, wallet, cowboy boots, backpack with computer and jewelry. So these are the important things in my life, apparently. The storms pounded through for most of the night, and today was very windy and blustery and ASS cold. Which pisses me off, as I brought mostlyy pretty light weight stuff. Certainly not anything suited for a Norwegian style Blue Norther. Mom gave me a pretty kicck ass camel hair coat, though, so I'll stay cozy.

Tomorow it will remain ccold, though I will commence the drive south to Austin. It's a 12 hour drive. I get to go through Oklahoma. It's wild driving through there. I take turnpikes almost all the way, and the speed limis seem to be a mere suggestion, as everyone (including me, gleefully) goes 90 mph ++. On the way I pass through the area where those F5 tornadoes hit back in, oh what was it, 97? The ones that totally destroyed a whole outlet mall and a large portion of Moore Oklahoma? I had actually shopped there before, and now its just a huge expanse of concrete. Crazy.

My posting will be sporadic, as my laptop just WILL NOT connect to the net wirelessly. I can get oonto the wireless networks, no problem, but getting an IP address once I'm in the network is just not happening. I'd have to assign it manually each time. What a pain in the ass. I read something about getting some Windows updates to make it work, but in order to do that I need to be online, and well, that's kind of not happening, so it's all catch-22. It's just getting more and more tempting to buy the Mac. For now, until I figure out a solution, my computer is just a large expensive flat brick. It's library time for me when I want to post, I guess.

Friday, November 25, 2005


Thanksgiving is the best holiday EVER. (Well, maybe besides Halloween.) I mean, YUM! I ate until I couldn't eat anymore...and then Mom put out dessert. I dare anyone to not have some 7 layer mocha cake or rocky road pie when it is presented to them. Lord, the bounty of my home country...big servings, fat people (like me!).

Even better than the turkey dinner is the next day,. with turkey and gravy sandwiches......

However, there are some turkeys you'd rather not deal with, like Time Warner Cable in Austin. I want to have some TV while i am there, so I can catch up on some pop culture. God Time Warner SUCKS. I called them, and they put me on hold before I could even say anything (hello, potential customer?) and then, when I would ask a question, they were very snippy. Well, I am asking about your services, here, I need help, and yes, I am a special case. No I don't have a home phone number, I have a CELL PHONE. And yes, that area code is different! Perhaps you could get off your high horse and be a person and help me figure this out? Yes, I would like to transfer that service...oh you tell me it's possible, but I have to go to their offices in bumfuck Austin and present myself in person to sign papers? papers that show I am "responsible for that address". And I'm like, well, shucks I left the deed to my house in NORWAY where I flew in from!!!! And when I tell you that I can't come on the day you tell me to, you say that they are "lenient" with folks like me? Lenient? what the fuck does LENIENT mean? I'm not a prisoner in jail, I am a potential customer and lenient is really not something that would apply to me, you fucking pretentious, sighing, sarcastic voiced BITCH! I'm sory you have a job in the service industry, but you do, and that would then imply that you offer me SERVICE and not SARCASM and nastiness.

Worst part of it is, Time Warner is my only cable option. Monopolistic fuckers.

I'm typing this on my Mom's iBook G4, which I am severely tempted to steal...however, even though my parents have a whole wireless network set up, it all goes into a dial up account, which to me is like having the newest, niftiest airplane in the world but two guys with bat wings tied to their arms doing the flying. So much potential power, tied to a 28k dial up account. (They can't get braodband outt here in the Ozarks.) And now Dad's logged in too, on his monster G5 desktop, and I wonder how long it will take for this to upload...well, we'll see.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Things are different here

I always spend the first few days of a visit back home remarking, "God, I'm just not used to this anymore!"

So far the things I am remembering/getting used to again are:

Unlike Norway, the majority of doors here do NOT open automatically. And you look like a total goof standing in front of one, waiting for it to open on its own. I ran into one, once, because I just assumed it would open before I got to it. It didn't. Ow.

Cars are bigger, and sorry to say, way uglier here. I also have forgotten the growl of big engines and the blatting sound of a car with sport exhaust. I drag raced a Bitchin' Camaro today. I won. Audis are stealth fast.

Traffic lights are annoying. Roundabouts are a much better system.

I am doubtful when I drive into a parking lot and parking is free. I keep looking for the parking ticket machine. Free parking at the Galleria? Right outside the door? Impossible. I wandered all over the parking lot trying to find the machine. Never found it. Still feel like I got away with something.

Dollars seem much more valuable than kroners. I think nothing of spending 300 kroners, but $50 seems like alot of money. Whenever I start to freak about the cost of something, I just change it into kroners and feel better.

The smell that Mexican food leaves on your clothes and hair is very unique. And very long lasting. It actually goes through multiple layers of clothes and turns the fabric limp. Strong stuff.

Mexican food farts are the absolute worst. I'm farting myself out of the room regularly, and feel very sorry for anyone who walked into the housewares section at Target after me this morning.

It's 80 fucking degrees in Houston today. And it's 35 in Norway. I prefer the former.

Talking to strangers is lovely. And they smile at you here, too. And I've had, like, 6 little chatty small talks with folks at check out registers and the like. It's AWESOME!

When I'm in Norway, whenever I see someone wearing a t-shirt that says "Texas" on it, I HAVE to talk to them. Or at least give them a really big smile. Here, that can get you in trouble. Lots of folks are wearing Texas t-shirts. LOTS of them.

And one for the random oddity category: WHY does the shower head at my brother's house come out of the wall at chest level? In order to wash my hair, I actually have to get onto my knees. That's just WRONG. I went and bought him one of those hand-held shower heads today, because I just can't see how he gets clean in there, him being 6' 4". It's lots better now. Merry Christmas bro! I give you...water pressure!

Monday, November 21, 2005

Wierdo magnet

....or maybe I should say "collector of interesting people".

On my flight from Oslo I had....... a guy who sang out loud to every freaking song he heard, a musician coming home from being on tour who was giving me the eye something fierce and wore overalls and a Rex Harrison hat, an old man who commented loudly and wrongly on EVERY GODDAMN landmass he saw from the plane, and a flight attendant who tickled my feet whenever he walked by. (I was lucky enough to get a row of seats to myself and so could stretch out).

The crazy thing about this is, I have actually had my feet tickled by the SAME guy on a previous flight. I totally remembered him as the foot tickler, and then he goes and does it again! I hated it the first time he did it, so to have to endure it again? impertinent!

A foot fetishist flight attendant. Things like this only happen to me, I swear.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

There's NO (crash) place (WHAM) like HOME!

I swear to effing God, I feel like Dorothy in Oz, except with much bigger feet and carrying a much bigger load than a Toto-filled basket.

I'm all like, "There's no place like home! There's no place like home!".... heels crashing together, red sequins everywhere as they fly off the shoes and combust into tiny little sparkly flames. Toto's fucking FREAKING out in the corner, after having been dumped out of his basket because Momma needs the space for her computer cord, phone charger, camera charger, wireless adapter, travel mouse and other assorted things she spent hours trying to gather together.

I've been packing for, like three hours now, and it seems that I pack the same amount of stuff if I go away for a week or two months. Four pairs of jeans, t-shirts, sweaters, a few fabulous things, some comfy things. And honestly, I don't really care what I pack, except it's got to cover painting a house, 20 degree weather, 80 degree weather, Christmas, New Year's and hiking a variety of hills. No pressure.

Home! Home! Home!!!!!!! (crash clack YOWL! splat) Oh crap, I squished the damn yappy dog between my giant heels.

decisions decisions

I'm going to the States this week. My first Thanksgiving in four years. Woo!

I haven't packed yet. I'm a bit overwhelmed.

I've got some decisions to make, you see. My original plane ticket would have given me about two weeks in good ol' Texas. But honestly, I've been stressed to the MAX about how I won't have enough time to get a bunch of stuff done, like, basically spruce up our house after years of not neglect, but definite slacking. Yard, interior paint, some landscaping issues, etc etc. Two weeks. Also fit in catching up with friends, family and other stuff( like a party, teehee) and you have one stretched out Karla. Oy. I tried changing the return date on my ticket to get some extra time, but guess what? There's a little clause that says "If you don't use this ticket exactly as listed, it becomes a useless piece of toilet paper. NO CHANGES WHATSOEVER. You're fucked."


But wait....what the hell have I been saving up all these frequent flyer miles for? I've got quite a few of them now. Aren't they supposed to be used for rewards or something?

And, indeed, they are. Now if someone would explain to me why it is SO much easier to get a ticket with frequent flyer miles that is totally flexible, you can have 10 days before you confirm, and completely changeable, when if you are paying for it, they make it so inflexible and complex it's almost crazy making, I'd appreciate it. Seriously. I was AMAZED at how easy it was to get a round trip ticket with my miles from Houston to Oslo. Took about 10 minutes. We batted around some dates, me and Ross the Airline Guy, and boom, I've got an extended stay in the US. Possibly until mid January! (It would mean giving up our trip to Italy, but frankly, right now, Austin appeals more to me than anywhere.) This way I'd be skipping the return portion of the ticket I have now, but that money is already spent and gone, and this new ticket is totally free. And it also gets me back to Houston in October. Who knows, maybe by then I wouldn't need a return to Oslo again.....

Whatever. It means that I miss the darkest days of the year here, and honestly, I could use the break from Norway. I haven't been enjoying it much here lately.

Now the big question: Anyone in Austin need some Christmas help? I can get a JOB! I'm very experienced at gift wrapping, being charming, and I bet I'd make a cute, if oversized, Santa's Helper! It would be GREAT to have a job again, if only a temp one! Speaking to people in English, saying "Hi Y'all! and chatting small talk to strangers (which is just NOT done in Norway) sounds awful nice right now. (Good Lord, I sound like a Wal-Mart greeter right there, don't I? Sorry, Wal-Mart, I'm a Target kinda gal.)

None of this is set in stone, yet, this ticket change. I have 10 days before I confirm. I can still come back as planned. But right now Rich is looking up a ticket to come join me in Austin in late December or early January. If he does find one, then I am staying on for sure. It would be his first time back in Texas in three 1/2 years. And Rich is getting a bit excited about the idea of Barbecue. He loves him the brisket.

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Just doin' what I do best....

Two of my favorite things to do (and things at which, frankly, I'm pretty durn good at) are getting people drunk and making jewelry.

Last night I got to combine the two and I think it was a heckuvalotta fun.

I had a Ladies Drinks Evening for the members of the "wives' club" of my husband's company. It was a small, but dedicated, turnout. We managed to tear through all the wine, dance to Madonna's newest, talk about all sorts of girl stuff, and, of course, play with jewelry which I had made. Our ages ranged from 28 to 48. But we all acted like teenagers. It was a fun time. Some people bought some stuff, some didn't, some oohed and aahed, and some gave me the devil sign and told me to back off because they'd be in trouble if they bought YET ANOTHER thing from me. Teehee. I've become everyone's favorite tempting indulgence. I'm like the Willie Wonka of GirlLand.

I also invited the ladies from my favorite shop, called Noa Noa, to come show some of their stuff, and it gave them a chance to meet some of us expats (though I discovered that the two who came weren't Norwegian, either, so we had no Norwegians at the party whatsoever!) The clothes that store carries are incredible. Very historically based, whimsical, classic yet funky, and the fabrics and colors are AMAZING. It's fairly expensive, but it can't be beat if you want something that's just that little bit out of the ordinary. It's the only place I've found in Norway the stands out from the crowd in terms of uniqueness. And they ended up loving my jewelry as well, which I was happy about. I think it fits the style of the store well. I want to keep the jewelry making strictly hobby, for now, but I would enjoy making some things customized for specific clothing collections, and so forth. What fun! What a great challenge! And what great experience for when I get back to the States!

The only problem with my "getting people drunk" talent is that in so doing, I usually end up drunk myself. And today, I am oh-so-paying for that talent. Oh Lord, please take the upper portion of my head and just lop it right off, won't you? It really really hurts. I hope it stops hurting in time for Harry Potter tonight at 5:30. Only 5 more hours...wwwooo! WOOOO!

Thursday, November 17, 2005

A meme! A meme!

I haven't found a meme I've been interested in doing for a while, but I finally found one. I stolded it from Cy. AND I'm tagging two people with it. So, Bookhart, you were bitching about the lack of memes, so you are officially tagged. And Kjersti, you too.

8 Firsts.
First Best Friend: I'm lucky enough to have two. Lula and Bookhart.
First Kiss: A guy named Lee. In the parking garage in the Galleria, Houston.
First Screen Name: karlagodwoman
First Pet: A white German Shepherd name Muschi. I was a real little kid.
First Piercing: Ear.
First Crush: A guy named Andy. 7th grade. God my tastes have definitely grown.
First CD: Robert Plant, Principle of Moments.
First Car: 1967 Corvair Convertible. Yellow. Very loud engine, dual carbed. I called it "The Pleasuredome".

7 Lasts.
Last alcoholic beverage: wine. Now.
Last Car Ride: Tuesday, with my friend Judy. I am car free now.
Last Kiss: Yesterday.
Last Movie Seen: Tuesday. Elizabethtown. I give it a 5 outta 10.
Last Phone Call: Mom.
Last CD played: The new Madonna. Some of those songs kick ass. Others, not so much. I give it a 7.5 outta 10.

6 Have You Evers.

Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Friends: No.
Have You Ever Broken the Law: Which time?
Have You Ever Been Arrested: Not arrested, but there was a warrant out for me.
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: Yes. Numerously.
Have You Ever Been in love: Yes.

5 Things.
5 Things You're Wearing: red cord pants, black and white striped t-shirt, black chenille sweater, red/white/black Mephisto sneakers, black underwear
5 Things You Did Yesterday: slept late, danced, blogged, made popcorn the old fashioned way, had a nice hot bath.
5 Things You Can't Live Without: my computer, my friends, my family, my hair goop, my glasses.
5 places You've Been: Prague, Marrakech, The Nile, Malta, Texas.

3 People You Can Tell *Almost* Anything To (in no particular order).

1. Bookhart
2. Lula
3. My mom.

2 Choices.
1. Black or White: Black
2. Hot or Cold: Hot.

Harry Potter! Harry Potter!

I've got tickets to see the latest Harry Potter movie on Saturday evening.

To say I'm, hell, it doesn't even come close. I saw the last one three times in the theatres (once in Amsterdam at the gorgeous Tuschinski theatre, once in London and once here) and I was totally excited each time. I have the DVD now, as well as the DVD's of the two previous ones.

I don't know why all that Harry Potter stuff gets me, but I guess it's just because it's such an elemental story that in many ways we can all relate to. A boy who thinks he's average and nothing special suddenly becomes a hero. A bit like Cinderella, that.

Plus, is Daniel Radcliffe growing up cute or what?

Anyhow, yes, Saturday I get to see Harry Potter!!!! I'm more excited about this movie than I am about Christmas.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

NNOOoooooo I'm EVIL Dammit!

How evil are you?

I feel my evil mojo slowly draining away. Look, there's Barney the Dinoaur in that there "good" window. Yeuch. But wait, then there is this, a quiz about what religion is best for me:

You scored as Satanism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Satanism! Before you scream, do a bit of research on it. To be a Satanist, you don't actually have to believe in Satan. Satanism generally focuses upon the spiritual advancement of the self, rather than upon submission to a deity or a set of moral codes. Do some research if you immediately think of the satanic cult stereotype. Your beliefs may also resemble those of earth-based religions such as paganism.



















Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with

Which actually totally freaks me out. I've always thought of myself as more Buddhist Earth Mother-y.....Well, I guess it's a good thing I wear alot of black?

The morning after

Dudes, sorry about the BWD (blogging while drunk). I had a pretty stressful and wierd day yesterday and all I could think of from about 3pm onwards was "Me wants a glass of wine NOW!"

And a bottle of wine saw the results.

Ahem. (shit eating grin)

I'm oddly not hung over, so that's good. It's damn cold outside now, though sunny and clear. I slept really late, well, til about 10:30. Then I was awakened by my dear husband who came home for lunch and thought it would be funny to put his cold cold hands on my nice warm butt....There I am all snug in bed and suddenly there's ice on my ass. GGAAHH!!! He was getting even with me for my nightly ritual of putting the cold feet on the warm husband. That was a nice wakeup surprise. NOT! Until then though, it was good sleeping weather. But who am I kidding? For me? Everyday is good sleeping weather.

So the rest of the week will be spent preparing for a little gathering I am having on Friday night for a select group of ladies (that group being everyone in the spouse's association). I need to round up those dust bunnies and wrestle them back into their cages. We're having a Ladies' Cocktail Evening and Fashion Night. Girl time! No boys allowed!

Then this weekend I will pack and get organized, and then Monday it's off to Texas. Yeay Texas! It will be my first Thanksgiving in four years, and I am not just a little excited. I've already chosen the elastic waisted pants I will be wearing for the occasion. Extra stretchy. But I don't think I will be drinking any of this. Ew.

After Thanksgiving I have some time to spend in Austin, taking care of some chores, catching up with friends and stuffing myself with Mexican food. I might also get to go out to my friends' ranch, which I love doing. I love the country outside Austin. Man it's great. Enchanted Rock is my "soul search" place. Where I do my spirit chasing.

It's always good to go home. I just wish I could stay there. I'm Expat-ed out.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Mostly sort of kind of drunkish

So yeah, I've had some wine. Yummy rose. Sorry I don't have the little ' thing that should go over the "e". I'm not French. I'm 'Murkin. We dont use little ' thingies. Whatcha gonna do about it? (wobbly grin.)

Just so's ya know, I'm a happy drunk. Worst I'll do to you is hug you to death, and possibly make you dance, if we are at a party. I might tell you how much I luuurve you, but only if I've known you a long time. Then we might have a really deep conversation about the nature of love and life and um, beer. Or something. I dunno.

Umm...why was I posting?

Shit, I totally don't 'member. Umm.....hmm. Teehee, she says, in a girly and totally insipid drunk girl giggle.

Ok, so I still totally don't 'member, but here's a picture or two of some shit I sold today, jewelrywise. (Jewelry is a really hard word to type when slightly drunkish...try it sometime...)

Me likey's a wierd word when you look at it long enough. (And yes, I spell wierd wierd so just move on. Eventually the world will catch up to me on that one.)


I'm gonna go take a nice hot bath now. With bubbles. Wheeee bubbles!

Monday, November 14, 2005


What is it with dust? How does it always know where I am?

We moved to his new place in July and it's already dusty! I thought we left all the dust at the old place, so why is it following me here? Dammit, now we have to move again.

Anyone know the number of the Dust Avoidance Protection Program? Like the Witness Protection program, except you are escaping dust bunnies?

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Just so you know

It's possible to make 50 pairs of earrings in one day. I did it yesterday.

Sheesh. I am my own jewelry factory.

Saturday, November 12, 2005

If you live in Austin and are looking for something to do on Dec 8th....

The Not World Famous and definitely Not MTV Rotated Dentones will be playing the Carousel lounge in Austin on December 8th. The band, consisting of a bunch of "stain"* friends of mine, plays a smart brand of garage rock. (I guess that's what it is?) Influences include Neil Young, and, um...other stuff. I really don't know. I suck at this.

Dentones, early show at 7pm on December 8th. At the Carousel Lounge. which is worth checking out in its own right as one of the last remaining truly Austin places left in Austin. So, you're really getting two thrills for the price of one, and it's free, so what the hell are you hemming and hawing about? Just go already!

*Stain, a shortening of the word "abstain" which my friends do not do. They "stain". I stain, too.

Friday, November 11, 2005

Shopping Frenzy

Wow. And I mean,

I went into Oslo and checked out four H&M stores carrying the Stella McCartney line. Unlike the Lagerfeld stuff, this time the Norwegians (like the New Yorkers, apparently) were on the ball and they snapped it up but quick. Apparently, also, there was alot less of the McCartney line, in terms of how much they made and shipped out. So the selection by the time I got there was thin, to say the least.

But interesting.

Lil' Ms. Stella is once again a designer for women with small butts and big waists. Emphasis on long lean legs was the key point of this collection. There were a few pairs of very skinny-legged jeans left, some pants that came with either a wide cuffed leg or the narrow leg, and jackets in denim or in traditional blazer cuts in proportions to match those bottoms. The skinny jeans were way too skinny in the butt and thigh for me, but the waists were huge. The jackets looked like they should have been fitted and very snug, but when I put them on they hung off the waist and off my back, with about 8 inches of fabric to spare. It was a strange fit for what should have been a very tailored denim jacket. But they were beautifully made and detailed. Especially the denim ones. If they had fit me they would have been a SCORE for the price.

There were also (though I didn't get to see them all in the picked through remnants) sweaters, camisoles, dresses and some cool trenchcoats in shades of black, a sort of taupey blush, a medium blue and in just the dresses, rose.

I ended up getting a trench coat and sweater in the pinky taupe. My friend Julia got a gorgeous silk camisole in the same color. (Girls back home, I had hoped to cop a few of those for you guys, but there were NONE left. Julia only got hers because someone left it in the dressing room!) The sweater is blousy in fit, with a silk tie at the hip, the wrists and a v-neck trimmed in silk. The trench is big and poofy, with ties, belts,big pockets, epaulets, strings and much more stuff. It's fun, sort of almost like a VERY fashionable paper bag. I did also buy some skinny legged jeans, but by another designer, as Stella's just weren't working for me. They look great with the sweater and coat.

I'm sort of annoyed at myself that I didn't make it yesterday to get a better selection, but as Badger says, it was my "day two" and I just wasn't fit for shopping or being out in public.

I popped by the store in Sandvika on the way home from Oslo and they had NOTHING left except a small blue bikini and a belt. The girl there told me they sold it all out in half an hour yesterday. I'll keep checking back over the next week, as I am fairly certain people will be returning stuff. I've got my eye on a dress.....

But wow. What a retail roller coaster. Stella McCartney, hats off to you for a stellar (get it?) collection. My only complaint is (and this is a standard one) that designers (Lagerfeld did the same) tend to make stuff for a body shape that is much more boyish than mine. Not everyone has legs with a 36" inseam (and I'm almost 6 feet tall myself!)and a size 6. Some day someone will do a "Victoriana" collection and then baby, I am SO in!

Thursday, November 10, 2005


Stella McCartney is doing a collection for H&M. It debuted today.

I will be there first thing tomorrow morning to buy whatever I can. Her tulip skirts ROCK. I have much higher hopes for this collection than I did for Lagerfeld's. His ended up being a disappointment, to me at least.

Stay tuned til tomorrow when your erstwhile jewelry designer/fashion maven/blowhard pal Karla will report back.

Matching pretties to people.....

Eileen ordered a necklace after she saw the picture I posted earlier. A little bantering back and forth via email and voila! A necklace for Eileen:

Amethysts in four cuts (melon, briolette, faceted and leaf cut) with silver beads and chain on Italian silver rolo chain. She wanted purple and she wanted sparkly!

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Texas, You Suck*

Texans voted to support an amendment to the Texas Constitution banning gay marriage. What a load of crap. I'm gonna quote my blog buddy Badger on this one, because she says it really really well:

Um, can someone point me to the exact chapter and verse in the Bible where it lists all the people and groups that Jesus hates? Because a lot of folks seem to think they know, and it sure would be handy info to have, but I can't find it anywhere in my copy. Was it in the beatitudes, maybe? "Blessed are the meek, etc. etc., but gay people suck so feel free to hate on them just whenever?" Maybe my Bible was edited by a bunch of free-love hippies or something.

I'm just disgusted at the close minded attitude of many of my fellow Texans. Why do you think you can legislate someone else's happiness? Stopping people who love each other and want to spend their lives together from getting a piece of paper that says just that? Stupid rules for people who can't stay out of other people's business. Do you feel better now, safe from those big bad gay people? 'Cuz Lord knows, they ARE the biggest problem we have in Texas. Certainly bigger problems than a fucked up school finance system, children without health care, polluted air, overcrowded roads, and the ever-present Tom DeLay situation!

Jesus would have been the first guy to say "live and let live". Wasn't he also the one who said something about "Let him among us who is innocent cast the first stone?"

I see lots of folks casting stones. Hmm, must be LOTS of innocent people in Texas....

*Travis County Excepted.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

So, I'm taking bids starting NOW.....

My blog is worth $16,936.20.
How much is your blog worth?

Call 1-800-buy-my-blog, pay me $16,936. (I'll forget the 20 cents, I'm generous that way) and this here blog is yours! I'll even keep writing it for you!

making and tell

Here's some stuff I've made thus far:

Pearls on silver with dangly bits and silver circles.

Close up of the above.

Pearls on little silver sticks, slightly Egyptian in feel. Warm pearl colors. My camera won't pick up the colors too well. It's also a shitty grey day outside, so the light is not good.

More warm pearls and circles with dangly bits. I like jewelry that moves.

Pearls on silver, on silver chain that's wrapped around suede.

I'm not real pleased wtih the photo quality, I need to work on that. I guess I just need more light. Arg. I'll also post some fun colorful stuff I made.

colorful fun

A bunch of bracelets made of hand made glass beads and silver. Fun colors.

Monday, November 07, 2005

Best Expat Article. Ever.

I've posted a few times about my frustrations with the company my husband works for, how they say they have policies in place for the spouses of their employees, and say they offer support, when it's really all just a showy website that really doesn't do much. They say they offer career counselling when it's really just a fairly non-intuitive database of jobs, none of which are suitable for any of the women I know. (I have some ideas about how to help us find jobs, but of course, they would never listen to me!) It's very frustrating when you read the company slogans of "Putting Families First" and you know it's pretty much just an exercise in PC company propaganda.

Here is an article I found that humorously, yet pointedly, explains JUST HOW I FEEL about what it's like to be an expat spouse. It's just too good. Any of you reading who are in my shoes, I dare you not to laugh out loud. Any of you who have dealt with HR and their attitudes towards the wives, you will love this.

I am happy today, just because I found this. Anyone confused as to just WHO I am in this article?

Upcoming travel

It seems as though my goal of traveling every month this year will come true. (I need to make a run down of where and when I've been this year. I think I can figure it out by checking my credit card statements!)

Anyhow, I'll be in the States over Thanksgiving through part of December. Rich isn't able to come. (And convenient for him, too, as it's basically a work trip for me. I think he just wanted to escape the yard work and cleaning out the garage.) We'll spend Chistmas here (a bit of a bummer as it will be pretty damned lonely and everything will be closed for DAYS) but right after that Rich has booked us a trip to Italy, Milan and Turin. It was a case of "Where does RyanAir go cheapest on these dates?" and voila! It's Milan.

Don't feel bad for Rich, like I'm leaving him behind while I travel around. He gets to go places too. Like Egypt. For work. He doesn't seem to be too upset.

In other news, we actually went for a walk yesterday. The first in weeks. It was the first day the rain let up enough for that to happen. It was a nice walk, and it looks like I might get to repeat the experience today.

The jewelry making is coming along. I made a bunch of fun hand made glass bead and Thai silver bracelets. All in bright colors. Now I am making what most people come to me for, funky necklaces made of pearls and silver. These are not traditional pearl necklaces by any means, as I figure you can get one of those anywhere. Mine tend to be made with bits dangling here and there, the pearls a bit rougher and not so formal. I especially like pearls in earthy tones all mixed up, to be worn with jeans and warm colors or purples and greens. I'm also into circles and chains mixed in with the pearls. Makes it a little punk.

I'll put up some pictures later today or tomorrow.

Right now, though, I need COFFEE.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

I really wish I had something interesting to write about

But it seems, alas, that I do not.

So maybe I will give you some stream of consciousness bullshit about the small speck of grime on the left upper corner of my computer screen. (Don't think I could do it? Expostulate on a speck? Oh yes I could. I once wrote a three page paper abouta piece of gum stuck on the underside of my desk. It was 8th grade and the teacher wanted us to write a descriptive paper on something in the classroom. I named the gum "Chewey". I got an "A".)

Or give you a detailed inventory of my closet. (No, that would be a whole 'nother blog in itself.)

Or tell you about the weather. (Pointless, that. See below. Entry entitled "Blah".)

I could possibly get on my soapbox about the state of American politics and the ridiculousness of the government. My newest annoyance being people who are saying that a newly developed vaccine for HPV (the cause of cervical cancer and other problems in so many girls) is not a good idea because it might cause promiscuous behavior. These are the same ASSHOLES who say that the morning after pill will cause promiscuity, yet also want to ban abortion. Why is morality always pinned on to the women to the detriment of their right to basic health care? Oh the hypocritical aspects of it just fucking make me want to go OFF! But I'm not getting on to that soapbox. See? Stepping down.

Since I don't have anything interesting to say, today, I guess I will just tell you that I am heavy into jewelry production for the first time in about 6 months and it feels really good. Rich keeps trying to tidy up my messes (I tend to spread around a bit when I am "creating") and I'm snarling at him to "Not mess up my mojo!" Poor guy. He's a neatnik, and I am categorically NOT. He keeps trying to wedge me into a corner of the living room, and my projects and materials stealthily just keep creeping out in an amoeba-like manner, until every surface in the vicinity is covered with tiny sparkly bits of color.

Poor guy. It's tough living with an artsy slob. And now, as the t-shirt says, "Go back into your studio and MAKE STUFF".

Thursday, November 03, 2005


What is today, Thursday? God I've lost all track of time. It's November now, right? It doesn't feel like it. Usually by now, here in Norge, it's snowing and ass cold. But it's just raining and yesterday (the first day in a week when it didn't rain) I was BOILING HOT in my sweater and tweed jacket. It was probably almost 60 degrees. Wierd fall weather for hereabouts. Just strange.

I've had a day to mope, a day to shop (but didn't find anything) and dinner out with a friend, to help me regroup and feel a bit better. Now I just have to figure out "what's next?" What am I going to do with my time here in Norway now?

I'm kind of pissed because in thinking we'd be going to Dubai, we did not plan our Christmas trip, which would have been to Bangkok. Now that it looks like we can go again, the cost of flights has gone up so tremendously it's not even funny. Around $2000 each round trip. So it turns out we can't go after all. God it's annoying. Apparently Christmas is the most popular time for people in Scandinavia to go to Thailand. What about those of us who want to visit family? Airline bastards, greedy Gus's.

I've signed on to do a jewelry sale in two weeks. Which means I must needs sit down and actually make some stuff. It seems some ladies requested I come sell my stuff, which does make me feel good. So I guess I better live up to the promise and have something to sell. I haven't made anything in quite a few months, what with moving, traveling, worrying, stressing and general chaos. It will be soothing to just dive in and get my hands busy on some creative projects.

That necklace on the left, there, is one of my favorites. I made it to sell, but then realized I liked it so much that I'm keeping it. I've had quite a few requests for duplicates. Guess that should be on the list....and yes, MOM, I know that you are on that list as well. (She totally tried stealing it from me, and I actually had to hide it so she wouldn't "accidentally" find it after I left!)

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Bye Bye Baby

Well, it's official. The car is gone. It's not mine anymore. She has a new owner now. I'm pretty sad about it, even though it is nice to have sold it for such an insanely high price. I cried when he drove it away. I'm actually still pretty weepy. And it's not made any better by the FUCKING WEATHER.

In other news, we got some bad news yesterday. Two months ago, when I was in Texas, Rich called and said that his company was going to transfer us. To Dubai. I was really psyched about it, because I'm SO ready for a new place to live and I've pretty much done Norway. Well, it seems that now it's not going to work out after all. After two months of me planning for it, shutting down stuff here, researching Dubai and mentally distancing myself from Norway, it's all for naught. I'm fairly devastated, and Rich is pretty upset, too. We can't really blame anyone except for lame company procedure (they say they can't find anyone to replace him, which I think is a load of crap). We've been kept dangling for two months.....and then left to drop. Shit.

Anyhow, it's been a rough couple of months, with the not knowing and the everything being up in the air, and then me not being able to blog about it because it was all supposed to be hush hush. Selling the car was stressful, and I have to go to Austin later this month to take care of some stuff with our house, as my beloved friend is moving out and I have to do some clearing out and organizing. And there's some other stuff, too, that I'm worrying about.

Some of the more observant among you have been asking me why the tone of my blog has been a bit different. It's because I am stressed to the max, I'm ready to get out of here, and I can't sleep because I'm just thinking about everything that's going on constantly and I can't shut it off. And did I mention the WEATHER SUCKS?