Fuck Me Part Three, Very Important Up The Butt After School Special

Ok, so you know how my card wouldn't work yesterday?

And I was all upset?

Well what the bank didn't tell me was that someone (and believe me, it was NOT me) had been on a shopping spree in Spain using my card number and emptied our account.

Rich's salary, my salary and our vacation money...gone. Buh-bye. See ya. You can't even buy groceries, honey. You are so fucked you are beyond fucked.

Ironically, I have always wanted to go to Spain. But now I can't afford it because someone in Spain spent all my money already. I hope my money had a nice holiday. Cuz it sure seems like it did. Jewelry, perfume, Lube Express (!!??), restaurants and shops. All gone. All in one day.

We usually don't have any money in the account, but had some this time because Rich wanted to get me a 15th anniversary gift and so we saved up a bit from the holiday money, his plan being to get something in London. I am just floored that the one time we have money, it gets stolen. I mean, seriously, is this my life or what?

The bank said they would have called but didn't have a number to call us. Um, so they couldn't have stopped the card BEFORE the account was emptied? They waited until the account was empty, THEN they stop the card. Good. Very good.

So this morning we spent two hours at the bank straightening things out. We saw the list of charges and the places those UNBELIEVABLE MOTHER FUCKERS who took my card went to. So strange to see this lifestyle we provided for someone else. I want to know why they needed to go to Lube Express, personally. Who gets lube and jewelry in the same day?

The people at the bank were pretty nice, if a bit clueless, as, of course, this NEVER happens in Norway. (Yeah, and three car break ins, and a house theft NEVER happen either). They say we should be able to get our money back, but it would be better if it had been on a credit card and not a debit card. We went to file a police report as well, but the police were out to lunch.

Literally. Out to lunch. Come back at one. Between the cops' hours and the bankers' hours, I am starting to think I work in the wrong business. Must be nice to work 6 hours a day.

So now, when I go to London Saturday, not only do I have no card, but I also have NO MONEY. Which puts a damper on my shopping plans, yo.

I just REALLY want to know who got my number and HOW they managed to do this.

We didn't sleep at all last night.