Tuesday, September 09, 2008

What a drag it is getting old

Shit, y'all. I turn 40 and start falling apart. Nobody told me old age happens within a fortnight of your 40th.

My back? NOT good. I left work early yesterday as I could hardly stand up and everyone was on the verge of calling me "Granny Karla". I dragged my sorry wincing ass back home on the train and took a muscle relaxer which did not help at all for my back but made me blissfully tired and loopy. I fell asleep on the living room floor, feet propped up on the sofa and a pillow under my lower back. I woke up when my legs fell asleep and I snored so loud I could hear myself. SEXY.

I finally gave in and made an appointment with a chiropractor. This, in my family, is a HUGE deal and really shows how much pain I am in as in the 70's a chiropractor nearly paralyzed my mom. Yeah, seriously, she had neck problems and he 'treated' her by continually cracking and popping and whipping her neck around, and it ended up that her spinal cord swelled up within her neck and she had to have MAJOR surgery (cutting away spine bones, etc.) to relieve the pressure. Of course, this being the 70's, that surgery wasn't so hot either and she's left with a very wierdly sensitive neck that she allows NO ONE to touch. My mom is a peaceful person, but touch her neck and she will bitch slap you before either of you know what happened. Total instinctive reflex.

So you can see my reluctance to flirt with the enemy, the dreaded chiropractor.

I'm thinking, however, in the past 30 years that chiropractory sciences have improved, as the guy I saw this morning was really cool. He has like, 10+ years of school under his belt, plus med school and frequent seminars and additional schooling, and he was very thorough and wouldn't even THINK of proceeding without x-rays first. And he told me, without my mentioning it, that my bigger problem is actually my upper back, and we should do something about that because my back is, as he said, "a solid block" and has not much mobility and is just totally ganked up. (Ganked is my word, not some Norwegian word, fyi. Don't know where I got it, or if indeed I made it up, but it sort of fits exactly how my back feels. Ganked. Liked fucked but more painful and broken.) He thinks the lower back pain is caused by a pinched nerve. Told me to rest and to put ice on my back, which I honestly don't think I can do as I HATE putting ice on my back. (Once I had a massage and this chick used this massage lotion that turned icy and I FREAKED out. Just freaked the fuck out, the poor girl didn't know what was going on and, for that matter, neither did I. Just knew it was bad. Maybe in a previous life I died somewhere very cold on my back, like in an ice cave or something, I dunno, but I hate getting cold on my back.)

So maybe I have some hope? Maybe I can get this back pain thing sorted? He is going to xray my back this afternoon, then tomorrow I go back and we talk about the results, then Friday we start whatever treatments. I am trying to make this all impact work as little as possible, making appointments at lunch and after work. (Though considering that we have people at work who are on sick leave for weeks or months at a time for 'stress', I need to get over my guilt at an hour here and there for my back, you know?)

What a drag it is getting old.

No comments:

Post a Comment

All comments are moderated. No spam gets through. Don't try it. I Love comments from real people though! Thanks!