My hell is.....

Things in my hell meme stolen from Mags by way of Badger and Jaye.

Drinks in my hell:

• Campari and soda. I really, REALLY tried to like it in Italy. I mean, it's bright red, which tells me it should be sweet and yummy. Ugh, no, it's bitter as hell and tastes like poison.
• Wimpy downstream beer.
• Caffeine free diet coke. What's the point?
• Iced coffee. Ewww....Coffee should be hot.
• Grapefruit juice.
  

Food in my hell:

• Red, green and yellow peppers.
• Things with exoskeletons that I have to de-shell or remove the heads of.
• Organ meats of any kind.
• Things with eyes.
• Capers.
• Lutefisk.

Occupations in my hell:

• Working closely with copy machines or office equipment of any kind. (Unfortunately am doing some of that now and I think that my secret super power is breaking office machines by merely looking at them.)
• Being a Ryan Air or any airline check in person.
• Waitress.
• Child care.
• Cleaner of cat cages.
• Peeler of shrimp/crawfish/lobsters, etc.
• Travel Agent.
• Provider of services to rich spoiled people.
• Any job involving the clean up of vomit.
• Telemarketer.
  

Music mix in my hell:

• R&B/pop/love songs sung by women with multi-octave vocal ranges and no sense of minimalism.
• "Smooth" jazz.
• Music meant to calm me.
• Norwegian Country Music (yes it does exist.)
• Contemporary Christian music.

President in my hell: um...crap. (Just what Mags said.)

Authors in my hell: Most of the people lauded by Oprah Winfrey. Sorry, I heart Oprah, I really do, but I friggin' HATE her taste in literature.

Husbands in my hell:

• Rush Limbaugh.
• Dick Cheney.
• That guy who heads the FDA who says women's menstrual problems are all in their heads. Donald Trump.
• Tom DeLay.
• Born Again Christians who are out to save me.
• Any overly religious, pushy guy for that matter.
• Tom Cruise.

Next door neighbors in my hell.

• Paris Hilton.
• Star Jones.
• Someone with 50 cats or dogs.
• Me. I'm noisy.

Only activities allowed in my hell:

• Being online using a 28.8 dial up connection.
• Dusting.
• Fixing copy machines.
• Watching "Eyes Wide Shut" over and over.
• Sitting on a very crowded plane on an international flight.
• Making doctor's appointments.
• Dealing with the US Embassy.
• Karaoke...with only me singing. That would be EVERYONE'S hell.
  

And my own addition to Mag's Hell List: My Own Personal Fashion Hell:

• Skinny jeans.
• Long baggy shirts.
• Hip belts.
  
• Tight shorts of any length.
• High pointy heels
• Bubble skirts.
• Empire waisted dresses.
• In fact, EVERY FUCKING THING THAT THEY ARE SAYING IS NOW COMING BACK INTO FASHION RIGHT NOW. It's all the direct opposite of what looks good on me. I AM IN FASHION HELL PEOPLE! It's the 80's all over again and the 80's were a VERY bad decade for curvy girls with boobs, butts and small waists. I'm very angry at the designers right now. (Ok rant over.)